What does it take?

I have a scheduling conflict. My son has his homecoming football game the same day as my cousin's wedding. I give my son the option of skipping the game or skipping the wedding since it doesn't seem likely that we can fit both in. Illogically...because I know better, I call his father.

Me: I have a wedding next month on Saturday and our son has his homecoming game, can you take him.

Him: No, I don't know if I'm going to have to work or not.

Me: So even with a month's notice, you can't commit to making sure you have the day off to take him to his game?

Him: No.

End of conversation.

I call a male friend...

Me: Hi friend, I have a wedding next month on Saturday and my son has his homecoming game, can you take him?

Friend: Absolutely, I will check my work schedule and if I have to work I will switch with someone or take the day off.

So why is it that my friend, who is of no relation to my son, who is not trying to get in my pants, who just loves me for me is more willing to do for my child than his own father? What does it take to get a man to be a man? Do what you're supposed to do. Handle your business.

At what point do your children become more important that your job? At what point do you say - I might be making money to support my kids, but that's all they are getting. They're not getting my time, they're not getting my attention, they're not learning from me, they're not experiencing my love. But hey. The bills get paid.

I work full time, I go to school part time, I own a house, I own a dog, I work out, I raise a young man by myself which includes taking him to school & football or basketball or cross country or soccer 5 to 6 days a week, making sure his clothes, sports equipment and his behind are washed, his homework is done, he has uniforms ready for school, he has lunch or lunch money ready to go, the permission slips, physical papers, school forms are signed, the house is clean & smells good, the dog is walked, gas is in the car, the lawn is mowed, the plants are watered, dinner is made, I do my own homework, I check in on my friends and family AND still find the time for an occassional date..... and you? Well you don't do any of those things. But hey. You go to work. Now that's a great dad.